Post-A-Day 2011 Bonus: You Only Have An Hour To Live


Some of the WordPress – suggested blog topics are interesting enough to write an entire blog around them; this is one of them. So, since I only have an hour to work, I’d like to spend at least part of it thinking about how I would spend my last hour. I think it would be fun to expire at midnight, so our imagining begins at 11 pm…

11:00: Mope about only having an hour to live.

11:02: Realize that moping about it won’t freeze the clock or change circumstances; post on Facebook that I’m dying.

11:03: Write a blog post about dying. Include the people I love but can’t reach in time, and any last minute “screw you” statements.

11:10: Debate about the appropriate tag for blog post; decide “I’m Dying” will have to do.

11:11: Make a wish! Aww, I’m still dying? Damn.

11:12: Have mind-blowing sex with Brian; use new technique I was saving for a “special occasion”. Go for two rounds.

11:35: Get dressed. Hey, I don’t want to die naked.

11:36: Sit in living room with Brian and family (assuming I found out I was dying sometime before 10 pm or so), or just Mom. Apologize for being a shit. Cry.

11:37: Endure slap from Mom for continuing to be a shit; hand her a tissue once she begins crying for slapping me.

11:50: Remember list of passwords and banking information I wrote down in the event that I would only ever have an hour to live; tear apart my room trying to find it.

11:52: Guess you’ll have to do without…wait, I found it!

11:53: More hugs, kisses, probably crying. Continue until 11:59.

11:59:10: Set collision course for giant Romulan mining ship; pass around final “I love you”s.

12:00:00: See, I knew it was a a;wbgwllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllb

(12:00:01: And there was much rejoicing.)

Hopefully you read with tongue pressed firmly in cheek, as I wrote it. I would do most of this; however, if I was (un)lucky enough to know exactly when I would die I would probably have prepared for it a little more completely and would therefore be operating under those circumstances instead. Like…skydiving. Or something. Oh well, have fun with it.


One comment

  1. […] Post-A-Day 2011 Bonus: You Only Have An Hour To Live (shanshantastic.wordpress.com) […]

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